Here We Go!

After a lengthy discussion with the hubster we decided to start trying again next month. I haven't been his anxious for my period to arrive since I was in college ( har har)!

We decided for next month for a couple of reasons. One, I looked up my employers leave a bit more closely and it states they are willing to give employees on probation the leave but they are just on probation longer, which I can deal with. I should also have enough leave and money saved up to cover twelve weeks if we don't. And this is if by some miracle we get pregnant next month. If we do get pregnant the due date will be in December which is when I started the new position.

So the next step, besides lots of sex, is to schedule an hsg. For those who are unfamiliar an hsg is an X-ray to make sure your tubes are open. The re injects a dye through the cervix with ma catheter and then with the X-ray sees if there is any blockage. I'm a bit nervous because not only do they prescribe ibuprofen but also Valium to help "relax the cervix".  Eek not my favorite.

I'm excited to start trying and think we've made a good decision that works for both of us. In a weird way I also believe in signs that you're going in the right direction.  The day we decided to start trying again, it snowed for the first time in over five years. And not just a five minute flurry but snow all day. That evening we walked around our neighborhood with the snow falling softly at our feet. It seemed as if the universe/heavens were sending their support and affirmation that this was our path right now.

Two Cycles Left

Like the title says, I've got two more cycles before we can start again. Two short cycles, seven weeks, a month and a half. It did go quickly,  I'm hoping the next seven go quick too.

I haven't been feeling myself lately. I do feel caught up in not being pregnant and finding out other people are. It still stings, this month it was a coworker, who has only been trying for three months. Life's not fair sometimes. And it sucks.

Sometimes I think about telling my mom but I haven't made up my mind. I know that she had difficulty because she was an older mom, and I remember her telling me about a miscarriage where the doctor told her it wasn't viable, so maybe she had betas. But she never talks about it. I don't want to stress her out or worry anymore about me.  Plus a big part of me really wants it to be a big surprise when I do (and I will) get pregnant.